Dentist visit

Guest

A man and his wife entered a dentist's office. The wife said, ''I want a tooth pulled. I don't want gas or Novocain because I'm in a terrible hurry. Just pull the tooth as quickly as possible.'' ''You're a brave woman,'' said the dentist. ''Now, show me which tooth it is.'' The wife turns to her husband and says: ''Open your mouth and show the dentist which tooth it is, dear.''

Guest

Daughter: 'Mom, Dad asked me to give you this envelope. He said to tell you that since I'm now 18 this is the LAST child support payment he'll ever have to make to you. Now I'm supposed to stand back and watch the expression on your face.' Mother: 'Next time you visit your father tell him that after 18 years I have decided to inform him that he's not your father. Then, stand back and watch the expression on his face.'

Guest

"Son, I just know you'll do the right thing by this little girl," said the preacher. "You just marry her, and you'll be at the end of your troubles." So he did the right thing, and he married the girl, and about six months later when he saw the preacher again he tried to murder him. "You miserable liar!" shouted the young man. "You told me if I married her, I would be at the end of my troubles. Well, I married her, and she has made my life miserable." "That may be true, son, but you can't blame me," replied the minister. "I said you'd be at the end of your troubles, but I never said which end."

» Dentist needed.